Today was the last soccer game, played under clear skies on a windy 30-degree day. Our team won. They've won most of the games.
Afterwards we met at the coach's house for pizza lunch and trophy awards. As he was passing them out, one of the girls asked who the MVP was. Of course the adults all chimed in that "you're all MVPs!" Ugh. The girls were having none of that. They all knew who the MVP was and named her. One of the girls also named mine as the one who "got most better." "Most improved player" would be the award she'd get, if awards were allowed anymore.
It's so dumb. The girls know who is good, who is best, who has gotten better, who just isn't so great. They are all kind to each other; whenever the opposing team made a goal, everyone consoled the goalie, no matter what. Even if she was standing there checking her fingernails as the ball whizzed by. No one was nasty or snotty or acted superior. But they still know who the MVP is, and the adults don't do them any good by pretending they don't. What's that line from The Incredibles? "When everyone's special... nobody is."
My girl had a great first soccer season and is anxious for next year.
UPDATE: Oh, it gets worse! I just looked at the trophy! It says "Most Valuable Player." On the trophy! On everyone's trophy!
At least she agrees it's stupid.
5 comments:
We're all special. There are no winners. No losers. No opinions. No thought. Just ... ahhhhhh ... soma.
I wonder how many of the kids were also thinking that it was stupid. I know my kids would have been rolling their collective eyeballs. Do we just think they are stupid?
Kerri, I think all the kids felt it was stupid. As I thought more about it later, I realized that they wanted the adults to acknowledge what they (the girls) knew. The girls who named the real "most valuable player" were good players themselves, but they knew they were not the best. They knew who scored the most goals! They knew my girl had improved the most - she was the only beginner and did change a lot. They were not afraid to say it. The adults were for fear of hurt feelings.
I was imagining my daughter, years from now, going through a trunk of keepsakes with her grandchildren. "Wow, Grammy, you were most valuable player on your soccer team?" "uh, well, no... in fact I was the worst player..."
Edward, arggghhhhh....
"As I thought more about it later, I realized that they wanted the adults to acknowledge what they (the girls) knew."
I think part of it is children want us to be honest with them. If they see reality and we don't acknowledge it, then they can be frustrated, confused, or frighten.
All three of our daughters did soccer. They loved it. If we weren't doing foster care, we'd also be wrapping up the Fall soccer season.
This stuff is such baloney. I know my kids can't stand it. My 15 year old son is an excellent football player with a real shot at playing in college. The odds of him being MVP on his high school team are extremely small. MVPs in football are most often quarterbacks, running backs and wide receivers. We all know that and accept it.
My daughter is a solid basketball player but will probably never be MVP for more than a single game or tournament. She knows that, accepts and plays because she loves the game. And that's enough for her and I.
When everybody's special all the time, nobody is special ever.
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