New disability for homeschoolers to claim

Dr. Helen and Rachel Lucas are talking about this story out of Pennsylvania:

Girl's fear of school costs district thousands

Rebecca Maykish is 17 and dreads school so much that she stopped going regularly.

In fourth grade.

Those days off have come at a price to her school district and the Palmerton taxpayers who support it. Since 2004, the Palmerton Area School Board has authorized payments of more than $45,000 to help Rebecca make up for her missed school days. Rebecca's mother, Barbara, has used the money for at-home tutoring and education software purchases. She has also spent it on modeling classes for Rebecca, subscriptions to teen magazines, and travel to New York and Toronto with a summer camp.

All of the expenses were approved by the district (via a compensatory education fund for students with disabilities.)

I don't like to make fun of disabilities, but this really sounds like a stretch. Especially you consider that she went to modeling classes - that's school - and camp, which is usually set up sort like school. But wait! It gets worse:

... her writing skills are weak and she can only do basic multiplication and division on downloaded worksheets. She estimates she spends three hours a day learning. Barbara Maykish has opted not to homeschool her, saying she worried that she would not be able to help Rebecca with her math and writing problems.

Emphasis mine. The girl gets no education because her mother can't provide her with an education, even after the thousands the school district has spent on her.

In PA I am required to submit all sorts of documentation to appease the school district's demand that I provide an "appropriate education" for my child. All at my own expense, I might add, including the evaluation by a certified teacher that is required. Oh, and I have to provide 900 hours for my elementary-aged children - that works out to 5 hours a day within a 180-day school year.

But here's the real punchline of this unfunny joke:

Because her daughter has gone the past year without any formal education, Barbara Maykish said she thinks she might need another compensatory education fund.